Happy 1st Mother’s Day
(Note: I actually wrote this May 2004 pa and luckily I still have it in my cousin’s pc. It’s my 3rd Mother’s Day na last Sunday. This is a bit long, but please read on… )
My siblings and I get excited whenever the month of May approaches. Aside from my youngest brother’s birthday on the ninth, the second Sunday of this month is very special because it’s Mother’s Day. We plan for the gift and gimmick that we would have for the most important woman in our lives, our Mama.
We would usually set up a surprise for Mama, complete with the computer-printed banners, Hallmark Greeting cards, cakes, balloons, and of course the bouquet of flowers delivered right in front of our doorstep. But more than all the fancy things and fun times we have, it is only today that I understand better the significance of this occasion – now that I am a mother too.
It has only been four months and a half since I first gave birth yet it seems like it has been forever since I first laid eyes on the most beautiful creature I have ever seen and I have ever loved – my own daughter Kyla Dominique.
My pregnancy and labor were not all fireworks though; not like the ones you see on TV commercials with smiling expectant mothers. From a heartbreaking love story to a teleserye drama of my family’s reaction, I literally carried on through my pregnancy alone. I went back to Manila, looked for a job in a company that would accept a 5-month pregnant woman as a new hire, went to the OB-Gyne alone, even went to a Dermatologist because of some red spots on my body that turned out to be chickenpox, and traveled by bus going to Quezon on special occasions that required my presence. And when my father and I started to notice each other’s existence again on Christmas day, my water-bag broke at three o’clock in the morning of December 26. I was rushed to a private hospital in the province not worrying about the one month pre-maturity of my labor, but of my baby’s clothes and other stuff left in Manila. I was indeed one tough and lucky woman to get through all these – alive.
Everything I’ve been through since I learned that I was six weeks pregnant is just like a mustard seed compared to a sycamore tree-size of everything that my Mama has been through, and still going through, in her 23 years of being a mother. In this career called motherhood, I am still a baby myself, but my views and perceptions about a lot of things have changed quite positively. Having my own baby now has opened my eyes and broadened my perspective about the choices and decisions that my Mama had in the past, those that my young mind and young heart could not accept before.
Marrying right after college has put my parents in a condition where they had no other choice but to look for greener pasture to sustain a family. They alternately went abroad to work, my Papa as a family driver and my Mama as a domestic helper. When it was my Mama’s turn to go, I was barely a year old and was left to the care of my Papa and my grandparents. Mama said she came back after two years and it was really heartbreaking for her when I could not recognize her then. Similarly, I am now working real hard for my daughter even if it costs me week days and nights far from her. I spent sleepless nights thinking hard before I made this decision to work in Manila for a salary that could compensate for me and my baby’s expenses now. And maybe because I am afraid that my daughter would also one day just stare at me like I am a stranger, I can’t wait till it’s week end to go to my province and be with my baby. Never mind if it is a Friday gimmick night, I won’t waste that one night without my cute little daughter all cuddled up beside me.
When I got pregnant, I never thought that my gimmick times would really become less and less. Though I was still able to sing along with Mariah Carey live in concert at the Bonifacio Open Field even when I was already six months pregnant (I stood there for five hours straight!) and went out to dinner either in Glorietta or Greenbelt in my maternity clothes, my world turned a different turn after I gave birth. I would rather sing nursery rhymes, do baby talk, or just watch my baby sleep than go out with my friends. Now I know why my Mama chooses to stay at home to watch us, her children, pillow fight or check whether we already finished our homework, than to go ballroom dancing or aerobics with her friends. Just like Mama, every second that I can spend with my daughter counts, and I don’t want to miss any of it.
It is not only time that a mother would save to spend with her children, money is another important thing. My Mama would only buy things that are really needed, the essential ones, and she would even refuse an offer from us to treat her for a haircut or a foot scrub. While I admit, I used to buy on impulse, but that was before I had this big responsibility of providing for my daughter’s needs now and for her future. So before I take out a single centavo of my hard earned money from my wallet today, I wouldn’t mind spending some extra time to think about it first. Will I buy that really cute floral swim suit or that Pampers Dry Comfort 22’s? Will I get that new cell phone model payable in six monthly installments or that child’s educational plan premium payable in five years?
There are more stories and examples from which I have come to a better understanding of how it is to be a mother. All the sacrifices that my Mama did for us, I know I am now willing to do for my daughter as well. All the hardships that my Mama went through and is still going through for us, I know I am now willing to face for my daughter as well. All the tears that my Mama cried for us and all the laughter she shared with us, I know I am now willing to be sad, hurt, and happy for my daughter as well.
More than the surprise greetings, gift and flowers that my siblings gave me for my very first Mother’s Day celebration, I received the most important gifts from my Mama: the wisdom, the understanding, and the unconditional love a mother can give to her child.
May 24th, 2006 at 1:31 am
aww teacher kathy.. that was an inspiring story.. =) goodluck with everything!.. =) hugs and kisses 2 kyla.. =)
June 9th, 2006 at 5:11 am
grabe, i nearly cried, alala ko everything that you went thru, nagflashback lahat. I never say this to you, but in almost everything that i do I always think that you would have done it better, i dunno why, i grew up kc na you’re always no. 1 in almost everything. now that we are both mothers, i definitely think that you are the better mom, not only because i’ve seen how patient you are with peachy but also because of all the hardships that you have to go thru and still come out a victor in the end. you will always be an inspiration to me, and i still believe that life can only get better for you and peachy because you were born a winner and will always win thru whatever battles that will come in your life.